Argh! 6 weeks!

When I was little 6 weeks seemed like forever.... like the school summer holidays stretching out before me.

Squiggle is due in 6 weeks. It is VERY unlikely that I will be permitted to go over my due date so it's fairly safe to say that in 6 weeks (give or take a couple of days) SQUIGGLE WILL BE HERE! If not sooner.... At this point with Jack - although I didn't know it at the time - I had less than 5 weeks left of being pregnant.

I'm not ready. The house isn't ready. NOTHING IS READY!

Mark is now on with the loft. He had a very frustrating day yesterday when he worked himself to death and didn't manage to achieve a fraction of what he had intended. I had thought his plan of getting it all sorted by the end of this weekend was optimistic, not that I had told him that. I think it'll be more like next weekend. I think he's feeling the same way after yesterday. We don't talk about it. It's got him wound up so it's best to just let him get on with it and be there if/when he does want to vent....

Jack is going nuts. I don't know if this is the Terrible Twos starting, if he's teething (back teeth - ouch. He's drooling a lot and bashing his ears), or if he's picked up on the tension in the house (me - baby, daddy - loft) but he's taken to screaming and having paddies at the drop of a hat. Maybe it's a combination of any of those things, or something else entirely. He's being funny with his food, funny with his naps, refusing to do as he's asked/told... the only time he seems to behave is when I take him out for a bit. Yesterday we went round town and then to the park and he was an angel, until we got home and he was a little sod again. He's worse for his dad than for me, who is having a hard time coping with this sudden behaviour shift on top of everything else he has to deal with.

Since there is little I can do while the loft is being sorted, short of entertain Jack, I am making lists of things I do need to do once I have the house back. Lists make me feel good! My memory is SHOCKING at the moment for one, and also if I can't actually DO the things I need to do I can at least plan for them so I can do them quickly once I do get chance (which is good because time will be limited by then).

My Hospital Bag is packed. I have mostly packed my back-up hospital bag - I'm hoping that we'll be in and out within 24-48 hours so I'm packing light. If there are any complications or Squiggle comes on the bank holiday (like Jack did) and I have to stay in hosp for longer I want to make sure Mark brings me the right stuff. So it's going in it's own bag and being labeled as the extended stay bag :o) I have listed the things that need to go into Marks bag (like a clean t-shirt, list of people to call/text) and a shopping list of drinks and snacks to keep us going through the labour (these are things Mark will have to go to the Spar for when I first start off). I have also listed things to go in the "Coming Home Bag" which is essentially things for Squiggle, like a coat and blanket. This will be kept in the car seat i the hope that neither will be forgotten in the blind panic of bringing baby home. Finally I have a list of jobs I need to do before the baby comes, like go through and wash/sort all the cloth nappies and 0-3 month clothes we already have, plus buy any other bits we need to supplement them. And then there's the assembly of the crib & basket, washing of the bedding, ordering the new mattresses and a bouncing chair.... Basically get the nursery ready for Squiggles arrival.

I'm itching to get all these things done now and I'm trying very very hard not to put any extra pressure on my husband because I can't do any of those things until the loft is sorted. All the things that need to go back into the loft are currently in our room and the nursery. This prevents me from getting to the baby things, let alone deal with them. He does know though. He asked me what I had been doing this morning (when I was writing my lists) and when I explained he said "Oh, you can't do any of that until the loft is ready, can you?" and promptly had his breakfast and started work.

I'm feeling a mixture of pride in him, and guilt in myself, although I hadn't intended to pack him off into the loft. I think he'd planned on having today off!